More Friendship Appreciation

Something weird happened tonight. Good, but weird. I was running for my 5k training, finishing one of my cycles. Then I received a text from my friend asking me if I was home and that he needed me. So I ran back home and had changed when he pulled up. He and three other kids came in and told me they were on a scavenger hunt for their youth group. One of the things they needed was a friend who didn't attend the group, also known as me.

So the rest of my night was spent driving around the nearby neighborhoods, searching for things such as speeding tickets, pictures of clock towers, and Nintendo games. We actually ended up winning too! It was a ton of fun, and a great way to spend a Saturday night.Only bad thing is that all I've consumed since running 2.3 miles is 2 things of ice cream and three pieces of pizza. So currently I am watching Firefly and nursing a sick stomach.

The best thing about this night, though, was that it finally put some things into perspective. I have friends who love me and want to be around me. And those are the only friends I need. These fair-weather, convenience friends who treat me like dirt shouldn't be in my life: they aren't worth the time and energy. Please don't think you owe these people anything, the ones who like you when it works for them. Recognize who your true friends are and stick close, because those are the ones who'll never forgot you. Sometimes they'll even take you on wild adventures. Good night guys x

Days Left of BEDA: 17
Song of the Day: Radioactive by Imagine Dragons
Miles Run in April: 6.3

Art in the City

Hello bloggity friends. Today has been a pretty interesting day, but has left me exhausted. I already took two naps this evening, also leaving me short on time. Anyway, I spent today with my Studio Art class going to downtown Chicago to explore the Chicago Cultural Center and the Museum of Contemporary Art. Sadly, I don't have any pictures to show, but they are both very cool places to visit if you have the chance. 

The CCC does not just have art galleries but also houses a number of organizations like the Chicago Children's Choir. The building is actually the old Chicago Public Library, so it has lots of quotes about reading and knowledge from famous authors and names of prominent novelists commemorated on the walls. The architecture of the building is beautiful, but getting lost is incredibly easy. The winding staircases led to almost hidden galleries and collections. They host something called Project Onward which features artists with mental and physical disabilities and allows them to sell their art. The artists also have work space in the Cultural Center, where you can observe them sketching and painting. These works are incredible and a great example how no one should be defined by their disability. 

The MCA is a small museum on North Michigan. They had exhibits on the use of black and white color schemes, painting the void, as well photography. Painting the Void had a lot of projects that looked like destroyed pieces, such as a 12 x 12 foot piece of paper that had been painted gold, then slashed through and shredded. Another piece was a canvas with various objects on it that had bags full of paint at the top that the artist had others destroy to "make the painting bleed". The concept was so cool, I really enjoy destruction art. 

Well, the clock is ticking down (again). If I find some coherent thoughts about this tomorrow, maybe I'll continue talk about it. But I need sleep. Later friends. 

Days Left of BEDA: 18

Song of the Day: Bigmouth Strikes Again by the Smiths

Miles Run in April: 4

My Television History

I'm definitely more of a television person over films. Television allows me to watch characters grow and face interesting, new situations, while in a film, directors only have so much time and characters can only develop so much. Television has so many different options and angles with which to take a story. I've really gotten into watching new series and I wanted to talk about them today.

I first show I began watching regularly was Community. This show is about a group of students attending this anything-but-normal community college who form a Spanish study group. It stars Jeff (played by Joel McHale), a suave, good-looking lawyer who faked his bachelor's degree and is forced to go to school and earn it. It's incredibly unique, absolutely hilarious, and different from just about any other show on television right now.

After that, I began watching Castle, starring Nathan Fillion and Stanc Katie. Writer Richard Castle begins working with the NYPD to research for his murder-mystery novels, shadowing Office Kate Beckett, who loathes him. I started watching while the show was running it's 3rd Season, and have caught up since, and I am loving it. It has a lot of fluff episodes but when it does it right, it's fantastic.

I have also been watching Doctor Who, which I cannot explain without sounding a bit mad for like it. Go google it or something. I'll try and I write a longer post later on Doctor Who because I have a lot to say, but right now I am not a huge fan of the new episodes. The Rings of Akhban was better than The Bells of Saint John, but still, I'm losing hope. We'll see what happens as the series progresses.

Firefly is a show I watched so fast. I wish it was longer than 14 episodes. Stupid Fox. Firefly has one of the best fandoms, espically because the actors from the show loved it so much and always support the fans. (Also, Nathan Fillion makes lots of Firefly references in Castle and I love it :D)

My favorite show of all time, hands down, zero competition, is Sherlock. This show has everything: spectacular acting, brilliant writing, witty dialogue, beautiful cinematography. Though there are only 6 episodes, I have seen each roughly 6-7 times. I rewatch clips all the time because I catch new subtle things every time. In case you're wondering, my favorite episode is either A Scandal in Belgravia or The Reichenbach Fall. A Scandal contains my favorite scene of any show ever: when Mycroft and Sherlock go to the Morgue in St. Barts to confirm if Irene is the dead. a;lsjdlfjasdf. Going to watch that after I'm done writing.

I also enjoy The Big Bang Theory, The Office UK (free on Hulu!), Dollhouse (must finish that), Saturday Night Live, Fringe, Law and Order SVU, and classic Nick/Disney (which I wrote about yesterday). I hope to start watching Arrested Development, Buffy/Angel, The West Wing, Once Upon a Time, Misfits, and Being Human UK.

Hopefully this was somewhat interesting. What shows do you love/recommend? Please let me know! I love finding new shows to love :)

Days Left of BEDA: 19
Song of the Day: John Wayne Gacy, Jr. by Sufjan Stevens (again!)
Miles Run in April: 4

Nostalgia

Earlier today during study hall, my friend informed me that The Emperor's New Groove came out in 2000. That was so long ago! Yet it feels like just yesterday I was watching that in my family's animal-wallpapered toy room for me and my brother, sitting on an old futon that this kid I never particularly liked broke. That movie is hilarious and there is no movie like it. I think I can still quote most of it.

If you didn't realize this, I've been feeling quite nostalgic the last few days. I really miss the entertainment from my childhood (90's for the win!). All That, The Amanda Show, Monsters Inc., Cat-Dog, Hey Arnold, and The Lizzie McGuire Show are just a few of the gems I got to grow up alongside. I use to jam out to Maroon 5's Songs For Jane and, of course, Backstreet Boys and NYSNC (what girl didn't?).  While Maroon 5 has improved, the boy bands of today are no match for BB and NYSNC. Sorry Directioners.

Also being born in the 90s, I cannot remember a time when my family did not have a computer. My parents still don't understand technology that well, but my brother and I are both great with computers because they've always been there. My favorite games for the computer were Roller Coaster Tycoon, the Sims, and Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (which was really hard to beat!) We also had a beautiful Playstation 1, along with my favorite console of all time: the GameCube. I still play those systems pretty often.

Concerning books, I read a lot as a kid. I basically taught myself to read and my brother and I read all the time. Babysitter's Little Sister (never liked the original, not sure why), the American Girls books, Ramona, and of course, Harry Potter. Things were great during the 90s. What did you grow up with? What makes you nostalgic?

Time to go pretend to care about Consumer Economics. Later gaters.

Days Left of BEDA: 20
Song of the Day: Cardboard Castles by Watsky
Miles Run in April: 4. Still. I'm really bad at this.

Overthinking

Hmm. Blog, I am at a lose today. I'm very tempted to complain about the things that I'm going through right now, but I don't want this to become an angsty tumblr read-more post. After watching a ZeFrank video, though, I do want to talk about overthinking.

He discusses periods of ease and comfort followed by periods of breakdown and reconstruction. Everything runs smoothly for a while until you start wondering whether something is wrong or could be better. Than false ideas start to build up, things created by that worry and fear that are often untrue. Those ideas then replace the true facts of the situation and suddenly, change becomes a necessity. Manageable roadblocks morph into  unbearable weights. This overthinking often occurs in creative pursuits or interpersonal relationships.

I often overthink my relationships with others, assuming that certain gestures or phrases from another person must result from something that I did. Then I scrutinize all of my actions around this person from the past week or so, wondering where I went wrong. Most of the time this internalized destruction has no reason to take place. When I have faulted the other person, however, then that part of me seems hideous and requiring immediate alteration. Or, if it comes to it, I assume that the problem could be because of the other person. The light that I once saw them in slowly changes, now relieving flaws that may just be a result of my overthinking. This affects the way I treat them, and often it is unfair. I've ruined some friendships this way.

Overthinking is fairly easy to do. Whether it's something small like what to buy for lunch or something larger such as career or living decisions, overthinking has the power to disfigure normal thinking patterns and warp simple logic. Do you struggle with overthinking? How do you overcome it?

Days Left of BEDA: 21
Song of the Day: Imaginary Friend by L'Orange
Miles Run in April: 4 (still slacking...)

Songs to Lift Your Spirits

The last couple of weeks haven't been my best. Anxiety has been a reoccurring problem over the last few years and especially in the last couple of months. When another wave of anxiety overcame me earlier today, I began withdrawing again. That's basically how I deal with problems. I withdraw from others. It's unhealthy, but it's easier than trying to maintain conversations or fighting back tears if someone asks me what's wrong. 

Through all of this, though, I have found certain things that help fight this pressure pushing through my skull. I wanted pass these tips on; maybe these will be of some help to others who suffer from this too. Today I'll share the music that keeps me up during this time. They are in no particular order, just a list of excellent, stress-relieving songs. 

• Hey Asshole- Watsky featuring Kate Nash (Really, anything by Watsky works)

I know I’m often told there is a pot of gold

but I don’t see no fucking rainbow when my coffee’s cold.

I know I should be grateful, I know I’m good and able,

but I don’t have the strength to get up from the kitchen table.

• Lost in My Mind- The Head and the Heart

Put your dreams away for now

I won’t see you for some time

I am lost in my mind

I get lost in my mind

Momma once told me

You’re already home where you feel loved

I am lost in my mind

I get lost in my mind

• Stubborn Love- The Lumineers

It’s better to feel pain, than nothing at all

The opposite of love’s indifference

So pay attention now, I’m standing on your porch screaming out

And I won’t leave until you come downstairs

So keep your head up, keep my love

• The Sound of Silence- Simon and Garfunkel

Hello darkness, my old friend 

I’ve come to talk with you again

Because a vision softly creeping

Left its seeds while I was sleeping

And the vision that was planted in my brain

Still remains within the sound of silence

• Casimir Pulaski Day- Sufjan Stevens

Sunday night when I cleaned the house 

I find the card where you wrote it out 

With the pictures of your mother 

On the floor at the great divide 

With my shirt tucked in and my shoes untied 

I am crying in the bathroom 

• Imaginary Friend- L'Orange

Our guardian star lost all his glow, the day, the day you said no. 

And oh-

Let your love grow.

Let your love grow.

• Low - Cracker

Sometimes I go and walk the street 

Behind the green sheet of glass. 

A million miles below their feet 

A million miles, a million miles 

I'll be with you girl 

Like being low 

hey hey hey like being stoned

• Dearest- Buddy Holly

Dearest, though you’re the nearest to my heart

Please don’t ever (ummm yeah) ever say we’ll part

You scold, and you are so bold

Yes together (ummm yeah) our love will grow old

(Ummm yeah) Our love will grow old

You may-ay-ay-ay be a million miles away

Please believe me (ummm yeah) when you hear me say

I love you, I love you

Come ho-o-o-ome, keep me from these sleepless nights

Try my love again (ummm yeah)

I’m gonna treat you right, (ummm yeah), I’m gonna treat you right

• Come on Eileen- Dexys Midnight Runners

These people around here wear beaten-down eyes 

Sunk in smoke-dried faces 

They’re so resigned to what their fate is

But not us, no, not us 

We are far too young and clever

• Adulthood- Jukebox the Ghost

“And I dare you to survive 

being grown for the rest of your life

From adulthood, no one survives”

Have a listen, see if you like these songs and let me know! Later guys.

Days Left of BEDA: 22

Song of the Day: Hey Asshole by Watsky featuring Kate Nash

Miles Run in April: 4

Books and Such

Hello Internet friends. How's your Sunday been? Hmm, very interesting. You should probably take care of that.

Blarg, I have school tomorrow. And I haven't done anything all spring break for that. Boo.

But I haven't been laying around all spring break! That's a first! I was either working, hanging out with friends, or sleeping. Oh, and eating ice cream. Pretty solid week.

I finished two books this past week, working on a 3rd. The first was The Virgin Suicides by Jeffery Eugenides. I may write a review of this, no promises. The writing is gorgeous, I really enjoy his style. It's not a difficult read, but has some graphic images (if you haven't guessed from the title). Definitely worth a read. I also read That Summer by Sarah Dessen, which was my light read to counter the darker matter in The Virgin Suicides. It's a typically Sarah Dessen book: a girl, usually 16, is going through a difficult family matter, divorice, marriage, etc, and a boy comes along who is nice and perfect. She has a bad job, the one best friend who is fading away but can be helpful. Also, it's summer. Nothing too special, just a quick read to transition books.

I'm currently reading A Spot of Bother by Mark Haddon, the author of The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time (which is fantastic, go read it). He has a very readable writing style. It's captivating and funny and overall just enjoyable. I recommend both books, they are great reads.

Well, time to go. See ya tomorrow

Days Left of BEDA: 23
Song of the Day: Amsterdam by Imagine Dragons
Miles Run in April: 4

Running Out of Time: A Really really short post

I just got home, with 5 minutes to type this post. So, don't expect anything remotely profound or thought-provoking. After a long, busy day of work, I spent this evening celebrating my friend's 18th birthday. She goes to a different school so the party was mostly kids from there that I really didn't know. It made me think a lot about how all these little changes can greatly affect one's life and lifestyle. I could be a totally different person if this had happened, or I lived here, or I didn't do this and this. I'm not sure if anything good comes out of this type of thinking, but it's always interesting to ponder.

Wow two minutes to go. That's all folks, maybe I'll be home for more than 10 minutes tomorrow. Adios :)


Days Left of BEDA: 24
Song of the Day: Sante Fe by Beirut
Miles Run in April: 4

College and Decisions

Hello friends. Yes, I am coming to you from before 10 pm. Shocking, I know. I have a busy day ahead of me so I figured I'd write now. I'm going on my (hopefully) last college visit today, then the White Sox game! Pretty exciting stuff.

College decisions have been weighing on me pretty heavily these last few weeks. I originally applied to four colleges, accepted into all four, than made little to no progress in making a finally decision. I feel like I'm suppose to have that a-ha! moment, where everything becomes clear and the choice suddenly seems obvious. But I haven't yet. The two colleges I've narrowed it down to and am choosing between both are great schools, with great reputations and programs. Both have definite positives from going there as well as definite negatives. I'll just refer to them as A and B here.

A is smaller, located near a fairly-big city, and is similar to my high school in terms of beliefs and teaching methods. I have good friends going here, but also a large section of students from my high school go there. My brother will be with me, but in the apartments. The school is not as known as B, but is still pretty well-known for a school of it's size. You really get to know your professors and they honestly care about you and want you to succeed. They are very strong with getting internships. It has a strong united campus, but to get to places off campus you must drive or take the bus. But the school is majorly in debt and is quite expensive.

B, the school I'm visiting today, is larger, located in one of the best neighborhoods in the city. It is very well known, which is very helpful in the job world. I have two friends going here, maybe more, so I wouldn't be completely on my own. It is Catholic, which I'm not, but that does mean it has a religious affiliation and churches nearby. It is a short train ride away from the Loop, which is actually where my college would be located, and there will always be something to do. There isn't as united of a campus, but it's still pretty strong. This school is even more expensive than the other school though, which is going to be hard.

So, that's what I'm looking at. I need to trust that I'll be led to the right place, so hopefully that happens today. I gotta go get ready to go, so I'll see ya tomorrow!

Days Left of BEDA: 25
Song of the Day: Dig Into the Waves by Freelance Whales
Miles Run in April: 4

Moods and Music

Today has been a very musical day. Most of the day was spent in wanting rooms with a lot of time to waste. While reading my Mark Haddon novel, I scrolled through my iPod looking for something good to listen to. As I looked, I realized that I listen to a wide variety of music: REM, The Head and the Heart, My Chemical Romance, Billy Joel, Andrew Lloyd Webber, and so on. It's nice to have so many options, because I've found that there are certain genres/artists I listen to depending on my mood.

For example, while driving to Dairy Queen today, the sun was finally shining and I put the windows down to enjoy one of the first days of spring. Of Monsters and Men's Mountain Sound was absolutely perfect for that drive. In waiting room #1, I listened to my entire collection of Stars music. And in the next waiting room, it was time for Sufjan Stevens and Simon and Garfunkel. When I'm writing, I tend to listen to Cardboard Castles by Watsky, which has a great beat as well as interesting, innovative lyrics. fun. is great for running as well as painting. And I am in love with The Lonely Island, no shame at all. I really don't know what I would call my tastes. Not really indie, definitely not average teenagery, not really oldies. Who knows.

My music taste definitely forms from those around me. I distinctly remember listen to the Original Broadway cast versions of Les Miserables and Phantom of the Opera as well Styx's Greatest Hits while in the car as a kid. I have a good friend who makes fantastic playlists that I also regularly listen to. I always happy to find new music and artists to obsess over. If you have any suggestions, leave them in the comments.
Later gaters <3

Days Left of BEDA: 26
Song of the Day: John Wayne Gacy, Jr. by Sufjan Stevens
Miles Run in April: 4

David Tennant is my Favorite

Hopefully these late-night posts won't become a regular thing, but I can't control everything. After 3 days of working, I'm beat. So much for a relaxing Spring Break. Oh well, so it goes.

Currently, I'm remembering how much I love David Tennant. First, Blink was on and now I'm watching Spies of Warsaw, which is quite good so far. Blink is on of my favorite episodes of Doctor Who, featuring a brave, clever Sally Sparrow and the Weeping Angels at the height of their terror. Even if the Doctor isn't in much of the episode, his bits are brilliant.

I'm not quite sure what Spies of Warsaw is about, but so far it's interesting. It stars Tennant as a French spy located in pre-war Poland who is infatuated with Anna, a lawyer for the League of Nations. Writing is distracting me from the show, so I'll sign off for now. I'll try to write something more exciting tomorrow.

Days left of BEDA: 27
Song of the Day: Daylight by Matt and Kim
Miles run in April: 4

Childhood Perks

Over the last two days, I've been babysitting this five year old girl named Joleigh. She is so sweet and fun, and she reminded me of some of the perks of being a little kid. In true Emily fashion, I have compiled a list about this:

The Perks of Being a Kid
1) Never Fearing Being Brutally Honest
- Kids aren't afraid to state their mind. If they don't like something, they'll tell you whether you want to know or not. This little girl told me today that she wants a sister because "than she wouldn't be so lonely." That level of openness is so rare in adults, and I miss it.

2) Ridiculous Clothes
- When you're little, no one really cared what you wore, as long as you were wearing clothes. It was perfectly acceptable to wear stripes and polka dots together because you were trying. The pressure to look flawless is something adulthood would definitely be better without.

3) Being Carried to Bed After Falling Asleep
- I really miss waking up in my bed the next day if I fell asleep watching a movie. Now I'm just left there till morning. Sometimes it's not that fun being over 5'7

4) Enjoying Cheesy TV Shows
- After being able to predict the story line of episode after episode of a Disney Channel show, it's easy to feel nostalgic about the days when these same shows seemed gripping and incredibly original. I definitely have become more demanding in my entertainment as an adult.

This list will probably grow soon, but after a full day working on less than 6 hours of sleep, the brain doesn't function as well. Time to curl up under the covers with my dog and a good book. See ya tomorrow x)

Days left of BEDA: 28
Song of the Day: Stubborn Love by The Lumineers
Miles Run in April: About 2

One of the Guys

All right, BEDA attempt #3. Here we go.

I've always loved being the girl in a group of guys. I don't know if guys also feel this way about being in a group of girls, but I really enjoy hanging out with guys. I'm more relaxed around guys, because they don't mind getting teased or goofing around about stupid stuff. We can sit around geeking out about old video games we love and miss, playing Guitar Hero and trying to mess up the two playing at the time. I tell my guy friends everything-well at least more than I tell others- and they tell me about what's going on with them.

But don't get me wrong, my girlfriends are the best around. They are the sweetest girls I could ever dream of being friends with and we have made some of the best memories together. There is just something refreshing about stuffing your face and playing video games all night rather than the usual Bride Day (which I do love, I can't lie about that).

I think most girls have this phase of being (name) and the Guys, where the majority of the their friends are boys. I definitely went through this phase and, honestly, I miss it. A lot. In Elementary/Middle School, my closest friends were both guys.We were would fake fight and play Pokemon all day. In Middle School, we listened to MCR, played Guitar Hero, and pretended to hate everything (like you do during this time. Middle School sucks). The three of us are no longer close friends, one separated by physical distance and the other by opposing friend groups. I honestly didn't appericate their friendships enough at the time and I miss that time so much. I didn't realize how much I loved them both until they were out of my life.

So this is me learning to cherish my friends, and today I'm thankful for the guys who I spent the last 6 hours with playing PS2 and Game Cube. They are all fantastic and hilarious and I'm so happy to call them my friends. True friends are the ones who don't mock your love for all things Nintendo.

Days left of BEDA: 29
Song of the Day: Kill a Hipster- Watsky
Miles run this month: 0